OCTOBER 28-"When I was young and stupid, I sold my soul to two different demons. Now both have come for their claim."

“Don’t get that door!” I yell, as my roommate got up to answer the knock. I ran past him and blocked his way.

“Woah!” Craig exclaimed then went back to lying on the couch.

After checking through the window and considering the coast clear, I took my seat on the smaller couch, rewrapping myself in the blanket.

“Someone’s edgy!” Craig remarked, then handing me a can of Tennent’s asked, “Ex?”

I laughed harshly, if only. I could handle an ex. An ex would be cake compared to what I was dealing with.

“Worse.” I responded.

“Aye?” he prodded.

I contemplated telling him the truth. It was a crazy story, but I was so restless it couldn’t hurt sharing my impeding doom. After a few more moments of thinking it over I came to a decision, “When I was young and stupid, I sold my soul to two different demons. Now both have come for their claim.” I said flatly.

Craig looked at me silently, took a long sip from his can, and finally started laughing.

“Good one.” He said.

“Yup. I’m hilarious.” I stated without expression. I saluted him with my Tennent’s and downed it fast.

Craig looked at me in alarm, “You’re serious?” he asked.

“Deadly mate.” Came my reply.

Craig stared at me in silence, I could tell he was trying to formulate sentences, but what did you tell someone who was about to be condemned to hell under the cruel dictatorship of not one, but two demons?

When I could no longer take the silence I said, “I left you next month’s rent in an envelope in my room. You should probably start looking for a new flatmate.”

Craig blinked at me. I could tell that was the last thing he expected me to say, but hey! I was responsible...two demon deals not withstanding.

“So…” I continued to end the silence between us.

“So, when are they supposed to get you?” Craig finally said.

The question caught me off guard, “Umm...well, if I remember right…the end of the week.” I answered.

“What are their names?” he asked, all serious.

Again, I was too shocked to respond elaborately, “Devlin, I think and Nerd-catch? I was seven when I met them okay!” I finished lamely.

“It’s Nurbatch.” A voice behind me growled, “And we weren’t coming at the end of the week.”

I looked at Craig’s face and he was frozen in terror. I turned around and was met by two ugly, and unfriendly looking monsters.

“Sorry.” I let out meekly.

“So Nurbatch, how do you want to do this?” The one who must be Devlin asked his partner.

“I don’t know Devlin. Persephone type split?” Nurbatch responded.

“Oh, that works. You made the first deal, so why don’t you take her Spring and Summer?” Devlin suggested.

“Works for me. I’ll try not to have her too flayed by the end, I know how much you like your autumn bonfire nights, and the sound of crackling in the flames.” Nurbatch reasoned.

While this was going on, I was trying to get Craig to move. I didn’t know where we should go, but he didn’t deserve to be caught up in this.

“Craig, come on! We need to get out of here, or at least you need to! I’m not sure I can escape them. Move!” I urged.

“So it’s settled?” Devlin asked behind me, “Settled!” Nurbatch agreed.

“You’ll be coming with me.” Devlin stated matter-of-factly and an invisible force dragged me towards him. I tried not to cringe, or pee myself.

“Listen, can’t we renegotiate?” I asked, “I mean, surely there’s clauses against making deals with minors?”

“Nope. We’re demons. The vulnerable is kind of our thing.” Nurbatch piped up.

“Thanks Nerd-batch but I wasn’t talking to you.” I retorted angrily. At this point, I was getting really ornery about this whole soul selling thing and going to the underworld for all eternity.

Devlin began laughing, “Should I give you her tongue?” he asked his fellow demon.

I gulped, clearly not having thought that through. He took out a knife and pulled my face towards him. I struggled and evaded as best as I could.

“Put the knife down ugly.” A voice echoed loudly through the flat. A ray of hope reverberated through me. I knew that voice. I loved that voice!

“Buffy! You’ve come to save me!” I cried happily. Buffy the Vampire Slayer winked at me and then proceeded to kick ass. When she was done, we both surveyed the guts adorning my place. Craig had come too and was making tea.

“You are amazing!” I gushed. She smiled, “Shucks, you were pretty sassy yourself there!”

I beamed even harder, not only was I saved, but my hero thought I was cool!

“You know,” She continued, “I could use a feisty person on my team. How would you like to be my apprentice?” 

"Hells.Yeah."